At the outset of this workshop, we realised that not only was this subject very meaningful to Tisiola, but also very personal.
Her understanding of Love and Power, is very much rooted in her transition, from where she was in her life prior to 2008, and to where she is now.
I am not going to flesh out the full details here, because that is her story to tell. However, the bones of it would contain splinters, I’m sure, many readers would identify with.
Someone in her past, saw and revealed to her, something magnanimous within. Something worthy. Something noble, given to her, to use for the good of others.
And so, like many of us do when confronted by this kind of revelation - she ran. Back into herself, where it is easier to hide, and try to forget what someone has seen and revealed to you, something precious in you. It is too embarrassing and uncomfortable to pursue. Better to bury it!
Fortunately, however, five years later, in 2013, Tisiola attended a workshop run by Dr Jean Houston. At the time, Tisiola was still undervaluing, and undermining her values, power and self-worth, but by the end of the Dr Houston’s workshop, there was a slight shift within, so she agreed to attend another of Dr Jean’s workshops, this time on Understanding Your Light and Your Journey into Illumination.
And bingo! On this occasion, for the first time, she saw clearly, who she was in her entirety. And that meant - before anything - she had to stop. Embrace herself. No more hiding. No more denying.
Accepting the strengths others see in you, also brings responsibilities. But once you know who you are, there is great power in that; enough to harness the might and resilience you will require on your true journey.
Having a clear way forward is important, because it enables us to put our learnings into practice, which is imperative because without action, the most erudite of wisdoms are worthlessly wasted. Knowledge is only any good, if it is put into practice, and it is shared.
As Mother Teresa said – “Love cannot remain by itself – it has no meaning. Love has to be put into action and that action is service”.
We need only turn on the television, radio or internet, to see that Power, without Love is Reckless, Destructive and Abusive. Conversely, Love without Power, is Sentimental and Anaemic.
We need the integration of both Love and Power to propel our growth forward. Through the art of collaboration and the marriage of Love and Power, we give birth to Love In Action.
It all begins with knowing ourselves; embracing ourselves; and loving ourselves. We can then get to know others; embrace others, love others, and together, collaborate to know, embrace, love and grow all.
Sounds straight forward, doesn’t it? Yes, but……
The ‘but’ exists because all coins are two-sided, and depending on which side of the coin we pursue, will determine our growth.
Power and Love both have a Generative (Healthy) side and a Degenerative (Unhealthy) side, and, it is important that we know the differences in order for us to live and grow in a healthy manner and to promote others to do likewise. The Generative side promotes growth, whilst the Degenerative side suffocates it.
Recognising and understanding both sides of the same human capabilities, enables us to practice healthy growth, and recognise and reject unhealthy practices.
Open communication; Mutual Respect; Kindness; Patience versus Volatillity; Belittling; Selfishness; Controlling behaviours. We need to ensure we have good communication skills, and our self-care needs to set healthy boundaries. We need to be mindful of our self-talk and ensure it is promoting self-growth, not stymieing it.
Paul Tillich expanded the meaning of power by explaining it as “the drive of everything living to realise itself, with increasing intensity and extensity”. Whilst Love is “the drive towards the unity of the separated”. This drive enables us to achieve our purpose, get things done and to grow.
Tisiola’s drive to complete her Doctorate of Education, is because she recognised a need to educate and teach people, for the purpose of Transformation, not merely as an end means for receiving awards, and certificates to enable people to earn a living. She wants people to learn in order for them to connect and thrive and enable them to live their best version of themselves. And then go on to teach others to do likewise.
As Riane Eisler said. ‘The True Wealth of Nations is their people, not the GDP’.
Before closing the workshop, and to help us to become the designers and drivers of our lives, rather than hapless passengers, we were all encouraged when we return to our homes, to create our own personal Love in Action Pledge.
By giving birth to this pledge, it will not only clarify and define the way we intend to move forward from a heart centred place, it will be a means of guidance and calibration along our journey.
The very act of creating this pledge, re-establishes (or formally establishes), our core values, and ensures that we are honouring them, and using every day working towards the fulfilment of our life’s purpose.
A compass like this is so awesome!
Won’t it be wonderful when we equip all future life-travellers with skills of this nature - at the outset of their journey. Enabling them, in their life- times, to reach depths of understanding, and heights of euphoria, that are currently only available to the very few. Those we recognise as Enlightened.
Let’s face it, the winds of change are howling all around us presently. Tumultuous gales on many fronts of our civilisation. Our humanity itself, is being called into account, and to decide whether to face up, lift up, or just give up! Every living thing.
I want to harness my Power and Love, towards the wonderful new beginnings that emerge from endings.
Let’s collaborate, to co-create in Love, and to soar Powerfully like the Pheonix, towards a universally, loving, fair and sustainable world. A place where we can all thrive, living a life of purpose and reaching our true, magnificent, potential.